Tuesday, June 5, 2007
These last few weeks I have been mulling over something that I have seen a few men in my life go through which I feel is an immanent disposition for all of us with back hair and bald spots. I was sitting at Bob Evans eating my Border Scramble Omelet just lost in a fog of things to come on the emotional horizon and my wife asked me if everything was alright. It was one of those times when you feel so bad for someone in your life going through something and there's nothing you can do about it.
I have seen a lot of men in my life pass through emotional duress. I have been wondering what it is that sends men shamelessly through the proverbial 'midlife crisis' and if there is anything that whippersnappers like myself can do to ensure that we are prepared for it. First you have to ask the question of why guys go through it and then you can answer the question of how to prepare and recover.
I think it can come from someone that has spent the lion's share of their career headed in one direction and comes to somewhat of a crossroads asking themselves if what they have done has been as fulfilling and fruitful not only for themselves but to those in their direct influence .
A man can lose his sense of self-worth and effectiveness based upon a number of things including things such as energy level, unrealistic vocational demands, work ethic, family issues, intimidation, and so on.
I have been reading a book by Dr. Henry Cloud entitled ~ Integrity - the courage to meet the demands of reality. He states that a person's character is two-fold like the wake left from a boat. The two sides of the wake are task and relationships. Most people are capable of success based upon ability to preform and build alliances with others but it takes integrity to not screw it up over the long haul.
I firmly believe that faith is also crucial to those who are getting hit from an emotional storm. When it comes down to feelings of tremendous loss and also feels devoid of hope they really have to be a believer in the Resurrection. Peter told Jesus that he had left all to follow him. I can only imagine Jesus' response that Peter hadn't given up anything that he wouldn't get back 10 fold in eternity.
My prayer is that in my later years I can really believe in the promises in scripture that even though there might be a delay of gratification I can rest easy knowing that as a child of God I will someday have the full joy and inheritance of Jesus.
Finishing up on my breakfast platter I looked over and saw a man in his fifties wearing a bluetooth headset. I really think he thought that made him look younger. Man if you ever see me wearing one of those I promise to complete the outfit with black socks and flip flops.